Life is funny. One day it's business as usual and the next ... well... let's just say it's not. My beautiful sweet Belgian Shepherd died today in my arms. She was diagnosed with squamous cell carcinoma just a couple weeks ago. Just this passed Monday she hiked up to the cross with us and today she's gone. Wierd. It happened too fast.
It was only 2 years ago that Sabrina came into our lives. It was a total accident that I found her. I went into Theresa's Country Feed and Pet Supply to get a good grooming tool for Max and the Sales Associate said, "We've got a big black hairy dog in the back. I can show you how it works."
"Okay." I said. At this point, I wasn't even thinking about adopting a dog. However, we were seriously considering getting another puppy as a playmate for Max. Nevertheless, when the sales guy said that Sabrina was free to any good home, it totally didn't register. I just said, "Oh that's nice." Then as Carly and I stayed a little longer I started to fall in love with her. She was beautiful. Even though she was in desperate need of a good grooming she was still beautiful. And sweet. She and Carly instantly bonded. Before I knew what was happening, I began asking questions like, "So how much is she?" and "How much is it going to cost to take her home?" The poor kid must have said "Well, she's free." a hundred times before it clicked. For some reason the concept of "free" just didn't register. But when it did, I called up Mike and said, "I think I'm taking a dog home today. " And he, being the good husband that he is, said, "OK, babe. Whatever you want to do." So, Carly and I walked out of Theresa's with a new doggy and new grooming tool.
As it turned out, Sabrina was far from "free." She was 9 years old when we got her and although the records that she came with stated she was in perfect health, she was not. She had really bad teeth. The first week we had her she had to have two teeth pulled. And about every 6 months or so another tooth had to be pulled. Poor Baby. Then finally last Novemeber I took her in for another round of teeth pulling and the vet suspected a tumor. He wasn't sure though because the two teeth were so bad that soft tissue around the teeth was also so bad. So we watched her really close and hoped for the best.
I thought she just had another rotten tooth when I took her in a couple weeks ago. And she did, but it wasn't because of just having rotten teeth. It was because of a tumor. The tooth had to be pulled because the tumor had caused the root to be exposed etc. So she had to undergo another surgery.
The last two weeks have been a roller coaster. She had her good days and bad days. I knew something was definately wrong this morning when I got up to check on her. She was laying in a position that she has never laid in before, but she was able to walk out to the car for our morning jaunt to the dog park. When we got to the dog park she just stood there. Didn't move. Didn't go potty and then walked over to the cement and laid down and wouldn't get back up. I could tell she was in tremondous pain and knew we were near the end. I put the other two dogs in the car and came back and carried Sabrina to the car.
I knew I couldn't go to church today because I knew Sabrina was real close. When we got back from the dog park the kids and I knelt down next to Sabrina and said a prayer. We all cried together and said our goodbyes to Sabrina.
Tonight at around a 7:45 she was whining for me. She wanted to get up and couldn't. So I helped her up and was going to take her outside. As I was helping her, she collapsed in my arms and starting siezing. It was over. I just held her and waited for it to end. When it did I drove her to the Emergency Animal Clinic in Thousand Oaks and said my final goodbyes.
So, it's funny how life is. You can expect for these things to happen and you can know it's going to happen, but no matter what, it still sucks. It hurts. Sabrina was a good dog. I wish we could have known her her whole life. But it was definately worth every moment just knowing her for two years of it.
Goodbye Sabrina! You're ours now, Baby!
5 comments:
oh Jo! I am so so sorry. That is so difficult. Lots of love!
oh my gosh why do you make me cry first thing in the morning! lol. So sorry, I know how it feels and it's not fun. Hugs to you :)
What a lucky dog she was to have you those two years.
I'm guessing Sarah and Sean may shed a tear or too as well when I tell them. :(
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